The toothbrush is to the horse what the Oral-B SmartSeries 5000 is to the jet airliner

We recently visited the dentist. He was impressed. Actually, he didn’t say anything. We never saw him. Why? We didn’t need to because our mouth was so damn sparkling. “I can tell you’re working hard in there,” praised the dental hygienist as she polished up our pearly whites. We appreciate the acclaim, but it’s misplaced. […]

Buy This: Ready Player One

Video games. Lots of 80’s references. A DeLorean. Do we have your attention yet? Ready Player One by Ernest Cline is required reading for any gentleman. The book takes place in 2044. Surprise, surprise. Humans have pretty well ruined the planet—financial collapse, massive recession, environmental disaster, resource scarcity, et cetera. Yeah, this might seem a […]

Buy This: Kissing Crane Hobo Tool

An opportunistic hobo steals a fresh pie off a windowsill, then what? Devouring the pastry using his bare hands would defile something virtuous. It would infringe Buthe Hobo code of ethics. Instead, he whips out a superb gadget. It looks like a pocket knife but expands and deconstructs into a separate spoon, knife and fork. […]

Every Candle Should Smell like Schnitzel

We at G@H are admirers of Eastern Europe. Our Gentleman-in-Chief served two years as a Peace Corps volunteer in the region. We appreciate the beauty of Baroque architecture. We enjoy the homemade wine and plum brandy. We respect the mustaches. We love the schnitzel. No, I mean we really love schnitzel. It’s like a chicken […]

Is in-shower flossing what we’ve been missing?

As the pulsating jets of your showerhead melt life’s tension from your shoulders, have you ever thought, “Gee, if only my gums could partake in the revelry”?  Nope? Neither have we. Maybe, though, the fault lies with us and our meager imagination, not in the idea itself. We at G@H champion the WaterPik. In reviewing […]

Soap to Cure the Winter Doldrums

Punxsutawney Phil recently predicted an early spring, proving definitively that groundhogs make lousy meteorologists. March has arrived. Much of the nation is still coated in snow with no thaw in sight. Lucky, we at G@H have discovered the perfect remedy for cabin fever: fresh cut grass scented soap. It supplies all of the sensory satisfaction […]

Waterpik Ultra Water Flosser

Does water make everything better? Slides, yes. Balloons, yes. Basements, no. Beds, not in this decade.  How about flossing?  Whoa, what? Yeah, you heard us correctly: flossing. We at G@H floss regularly (humble brag) and hope that you do too. We would not describe flossing as fun.  Like trimming nose hair, we floss to avoid […]